28th January 1953
That thar duck at tha bottom field wus frozin orver when I went an fed them thar ol' pigs a s'mornin - Yew townies wont now tew much about that - an yis it wus still dark. Roger Roger ee cum along tew, it wus suffin cold, that when ee pee'd like a race orse up that thar ol oak tree ee frozz to it , so I ad to breek im away wiv me spade. I waitid till I got back to thar barn afore I ad a go o´ that, on account o' I dint want Muvver breekin me away frum that thar tree an tearkin me back to tha farm ouse by me icicle !!
Roger Roger ad Jimi tha vetinary in ta check im out arter bein frozzin to thar ol oak tree - I was olly worried bout im an I say a'Jimi "Is tha poor littil ol bor a'urtin" an Jimie say "Not as much as yawl be time ya git my bill !!' Smify ee see Jimi's van up at thar farm an ee called in , ee say a Jimi that is air keep on a fallin out! "Well wot can ya give me ta keep it in?" Smify say. Quick as whistle "Will a shoebox do?".
Well ol Jimi he wus a'gettin reddi ta go when , that thar ol cat wonder'd inta tha barn an littel ol bugga ony went an drank sum petrol I'd left in a tray unda thar tracta, well man ee went round an round an up an down, an shot orff inta tha farm house an raced up them thar staires an straite up the curt'ans an then fell on tha floor, I say t' Jimi "Is ee deed", Jimi say "Nah, ee´s not deed ees run out o'petrol I reckun."
So Muvver's now ere a'narsen that thar ol cat, an Roger Roger ee keep on 'a sniffin about 'cus ee's not tew appy bout avin tha ol cat in tha ouse. Looks like ee'll ave ta put up wiv it thow - 'cus Muver's took a shine ta that cat an she's even started ta call im Blucher, she say that wus er uncal's nearm ee wus a wherryman an 'ee drunk awl ee cud git an ee never wush'ed or shearev'd thar duity ol'sod.
Well muvver's puggin owt agin so afor she git tha shirts orf me an Smify's back we're orf along'a Jimi down the Duck an Ferrit to settle our narves wiv a couple a pints a' cookin bitter.
Till I run ya a yarn agin - DEW YEW KEEP A GOOD LITE !!
Bye Bye me Bewties
p/s The sprewt picker's turn'd up ta'day, so if tha weather 'olds tha top field should be clear by tha week end. If Muver git's er hands on some on'em, tha wind'll be a'blowin like billy'o an I'll be a'flyin ma kite cum Sunday.